Discovering What's Missing

[Firaza]

Sorry if this is in the wrong place!

This thread in the Reformed Kemeticism SIG, particularly Devo's first post, got me thinking: Recently, I've been suffering from a spiritual block. I recognize the connection I have with my Gods, but I don't have the motivation to practice as I want to in the typical Kemetic sense. Meanwhile, I have always been incredibly moved by the power and energy I feel around Shinto shrines. After studying in Japan, I returned home with a renewed respect for and interest in the pervasiveness of Shinto in the Japanese culture.

While suffering this spiritual block, I thought that if I forced myself to make offerings and do ritual as I've always done them, I'd break through the block. However, Devo's post made me wonder if following a different path is actually the answer, and if it could help me find what I feel is missing.

I'm not sure what I'm asking in this thread. I guess, if anyone has felt this way before, what did you do? I'm not looking to leave Kemeticism; I love my Gods and my Patron especially. Yet I feel like Kemeticism is not inspiring me to put that spirituality and love into practice.

[Sage]

I'm not sure what I'm asking in this thread. I guess, if anyone has felt this way before, what did you do? I'm not looking to leave Kemeticism; I love my Gods and my Patron especially. Yet I feel like Kemeticism is not inspiring me to put that spirituality and love into practice.

I've been watching the various discussions in the Kemeticism SIG with a lot of interest. To an extent, I've been where you are now - I worked with Athena and Dionysus for nearly all of my Paganhood, but was still struggling spiritually and unable to find the connection I needed. I felt nudged in the direction of Druidry and have now found a host of Celtic deities (Brighid and Manannan, at the moment) who are opening new paths for me. While I feel that I can (or will) one day return to the Theoi, right now Hellenic work has completely dropped off my radar. (My one exception is honoring Persephone's ascent from and descent to the underworld during the Spring and Fall Equinoxes.)

Sometimes... you just really need a change of scenery. And now you have the background experience to know what's spiritually effective for you, how much time you have to spend on devotions, and what you're looking for in a religious path. It can be scary and disconcerting, especially if you have the sense of your gods pushing you out of the nest to see if you can fly. It was really scary to feel like Athena and Dionysus were just cutting me loose to go do my own thing.

Maybe your Patron (Set, is it?) will follow you into the wild and wooly reaches of Japanese folk religion. Maybe He'll stand to the side and wait for you to learn whatever it is you need to learn. But I do believe that our gods want what's best for us and have a unique vantage point we just can't see from. Something that may seem aimless and random to you may be just what the doctor ordered. Best of luck, Firaza.

[Starglade]

Sorry if this is in the wrong place!

Sounds similar to what happened to me a few years ago. Check out my post in the "Who are you working with" thread--I think it's in the Interfaith folder, but don't quote me (so to speak). I'm very inept at technical things like linking to threads and such. I pretty much sent up a flare saying "I'm here, who's listening?"

[Firaza]

Sometimes... you just really need a change of scenery. And now you have the background experience to know what's spiritually effective for you, how much time you have to spend on devotions, and what you're looking for in a religious path. It can be scary and disconcerting, especially if you have the sense of your gods pushing you out of the nest to see if you can fly. It was really scary to feel like Athena and Dionysus were just cutting me loose to go do my own thing.

Maybe your Patron (Set, is it?) will follow you into the wild and wooly reaches of Japanese folk religion. Maybe He'll stand to the side and wait for you to learn whatever it is you need to learn. But I do believe that our gods want what's best for us and have a unique vantage point we just can't see from. Something that may seem aimless and random to you may be just what the doctor ordered. Best of luck, Firaza.

Thank you. I still feel my Patron's presence strongly, though Anpu (not Set, though I have worked with Him before) tends to be the type to silently watch as I go about my life, giving advice only when I seek it. Maybe I should consult Him, as I've always done.

For months, I've struggled with the knowledge that I get so much from even simply observing Shinto practices versus the feeling of obligation to the Kemetic path. I dealt with it by putting off any decision-making, blaming my busy school schedule instead for my lack of practice. Maybe it's time to jump into the fire feet-first.

[veggiewolf]

...
I'm not sure what I'm asking in this thread. I guess, if anyone has felt this way before, what did you do? I'm not looking to leave Kemeticism; I love my Gods and my Patron especially. Yet I feel like Kemeticism is not inspiring me to put that spirituality and love into practice.

If it helps (and I don't know if it will), I believe Set pushed me into FlameKeeping in order to sync "-doxis" with "-praxis"...and I didn't know it was He at the time. The work I need to do is best served by acting my beliefs and I wasn't doing that before FK. Neither of my Gods have deserted me in the process and, I think, it has enabled me to be able to make a full commitment to ritual on a regular basis as of Wep Ronpet.

[Firaza]

Sounds similar to what happened to me a few years ago. Check out my post in the "Who are you working with" thread--I think it's in the Interfaith folder, but don't quote me (so to speak). I'm very inept at technical things like linking to threads and such. I pretty much sent up a flare saying "I'm here, who's listening?"

I went to read it. I'm familiar with Buddhism and do, in fact, take a few Buddhist teachings to heart, but for me, they are more like life guidelines. What's more fascinating (and powerful) to me is just how accepted Shinto is among the Japanese.

During one of my first days in Japan, I went on a tour of Inuyama Castle. The tour guide said, quite matter-of-factly, as if it were the most normal concept in the world, that the broken tree next to the castle had protected the castle from a lightning strike that would have destroyed one of Japan's national treasures. That alone was reason enough for the Japanese to believe that a kami lived in the tree. They had erected a roof over the remains of the tree and had tied gohei around the trunk. The Japanese regularly leave offerings of lucky coins at the tree's base, thanking the kami for protecting the castle.

I was so affected by the kami's power -- a power I tangibly felt, standing next to the tree -- that it's been with me ever since.

Hmm, I'm not really sure where I wanted to go with that rambling. Hopefully it's elaborated on what I'm basically looking for.

[Firaza]

If it helps (and I don't know if it will), I believe Set pushed me into FlameKeeping in order to sync "-doxis" with "-praxis"...and I didn't know it was He at the time. The work I need to do is best served by acting my beliefs and I wasn't doing that before FK. Neither of my Gods have deserted me in the process and, I think, it has enabled me to be able to make a full commitment to ritual on a regular basis as of Wep Ronpet.

That's what I need! Something that will get me to act out my beliefs in everyday life, as I'm not inclined to the priestly path.

[Sage]

Thank you. I still feel my Patron's presence strongly, though Anpu (not Set, though I have worked with Him before) tends to be the type to silently watch as I go about my life, giving advice only when I seek it. Maybe I should consult Him, as I've always done.

Anpu, got it. I read so much from the Kemetic SIG I probably got you confused with someone else. :D Definitely, ask Him for some advice. Sometimes being really upfront and honest is the best. Let Him know you're worried/upset, but also looking forward to whatever-it-is.

I dealt with it by putting off any decision-making, blaming my busy school schedule instead for my lack of practice. Maybe it's time to jump into the fire feet-first.

Been there, done that, t-shirt in the mail.

[veggiewolf]

That's what I need! Something that will get me to act out my beliefs in everyday life, as I'm not inclined to the priestly path.

I've not worked with Anpu, but it could be that the restlessness means you need to explore another path for now...and that He is leading/pushing you toward that decision. I'd ask Him, like Ellen suggested.

(shameless plug - I'd also suggest you look at FK, since Shad makes me mention it to everyone.)

[Devo]

Anpu, got it. I read so much from the Kemetic SIG I probably got you confused with someone else. :D Definitely, ask Him for some advice. Sometimes being really upfront and honest is the best. Let Him know you're worried/upset, but also looking forward to whatever-it-is.

Probably me XD I'm Kemetic, and on the Shinto path as well- and work with Set :P

-Devo