Feeling Disconnected

[rocquelaire]

I've tried several times now to write a coherent response and I keep tripping over myself. I believe the essence of what I'm trying to communicate is simply that we have a skewed perspective of our god/dess'es. We're like little kids holding a parent's hand and looking w a y up at them. When we can't hear Their voice we get a little scared. That's ok, it's natural. What we don't need to do is question our worth. They may have simply stepped into another room for a moment. I seriously doubt They waste time on those They deem unworthy. They can see far more of us than we would probably like to admit - and They still reached out.
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I think you're right about the parent/ child thing. I think I'm desperately seeking Her approval, the same way I did with my parents as a child. I almost feel like I'm going to Her and saying "Look I got an A- on my test!" and expecting Her to ask my why it wasn't an A! I'm going to try shifting the way I approach my relationship with Her to adult - adult and see if that makes a difference. As you said, She reached out to me so that suggests that I already have Her approval.

I had a moment at work today. A friend gave me a jar she painted for me with a flame and water for me to keep my electric candle in. It was a lovely gesture from my friend but I also felt that Brighid was behind it. I could almost hear Her saying "I'm still here! You're just not listening right now but that's ok, I'm not going anywhere."



I was trying to attach a pic of the jat but for some reason it won't upload. I'll try again later if anyone wants to see it.

[SatAset]

The kinds of things that help me with that are things like wearing symbolic jewelry and tattoos that are literally always with me and help me stay mindful of Brighid and my responsibilities to Her. I know I use that phrase a lot, but it's something that is very important to me. I don't want to be an "armchair Pagan" or only think about about religion on the big holidays. I want my spirituality to be as completely incorporated into my life as possible. I want to *live* it, not just post about it.

For me, that means I have to find ways to keep Brighid on the top of my mind as holistically as I can. Besides jewelry and tats (and I know many people don't like to wear jewelry and don't want tats, and that's fine), basically, I try to surround myself with little reminders.

~ Aster

I found this post extremely helpful.

I like your idea about having little reminders in the mundane parts of your life. Thank you.

I just cleaned off Brighid's shrine after reading your post. Maybe it's time I did more for Her.